I'm terrible at this........

Well here I am. Exactly 7 weeks since my last post. I thought I'd be better at keeping this blog up to date once Olivia was born...but I guess I was wrong. Oh well, I'll try again :)

I just read through my last blog and was filled with sweet memories of our last hours (or days really) before Olivia arrived. Boy was I wrong about how long my labor would be! In the last post I wrote we'd probably meet Olivia in the next 30 hours or so...well my labor lasted 32hrs..yep...almost one and a half long days waiting for Liv to come out. She really didn't want to come out! So here's my labor story. I'll warn you now though, it's going to be long. I haven't even journal-ed about it yet and anyhow 32hrs is a long time!

Starting where I left off from my last post. We were praying I'd go into labor naturally...that was around 5pm Wednesday the 23rd of June. An hour or so later my parents, inlaws, Scott and I headed to the Cheesecake factory for dinner. Towards the end of the meal (closer to 8pm now) I started feeling stronger contractions than any braxton hicks I had felt in the previous weeks. We all headed home but I asked Scott if we could go for a walk around the block to get this going even more. So we did, and while we were out there we realized the contractions were coming every 5 mins or so and I needed to slow down or stop walking during them. Once we got home around 10pm we started timing them and they were 4-6mins apart. We timed them for a coupe hours then decided we should try and get some rest. Scott fell straight to sleep and I dozed between contractions. I was scared to actually go to sleep because I didn't want to wake up and find the contractions had subsided..but to my delight, the contractions got too uncomfortable to lay through..so I decided to head to the living room and go through them leaning over the couch.

By around 6-7am they were pretty uncomfortable, only a couple mins apart and some lasting for a minute and a half. We called the midwife and she thought we should start heading towards the hospital..I was SOOOOO excited! This was it! I was going to meet my baby soon!!!

We got settled into our L&D room around 9am and I was first checked at 11am. To our surprise I had only progressed to 3-4cm. (I had been 3cm the morning before) But I didn't really think much of it, I was just so excited to be in labor! Lauren (my midwife) stripped my membranes more and as soon as she did the contractions went up a level in intensity and I could no longer walk through them. Whitney Waechter (one of my closest friends and now the Douala) joined us and immediately became invaluable. Soon after I got in the tub - water therapy is wonderful :)
At 1pm I was 4cm. Once again, I wasn't in the mood for asking questions, so I just took that in my stride and kept breathing through the contractions, that had now gone up a notch again and with every contraction that was a bit worse than the previous one I threw up. Yay...

I labored for 4 more hours and the pain kept getting stronger and stronger and most contractions were coming on top of each other, hardly giving me anytime to rest. It was getting tough, we were sure I'd be around 5-6cm by now. Lauren came back at 5pm to check me and to everyone's disappointment I was still at 4cm. Lauren couldn't understand why I wasn't progressing (and by this time nor could I!), I was feeling exhausted and very dehydrated as I couldn't even keep ice chips down. Lauren suggested I get on Pitocin (a drug to intensify the contractions) I asked her what the time frame would look like and she said she hoped I would be at 5cm within the next two hours. With that piece of information my heart sank. 2 more hours of intense pain JUST to get to 5cm???? and then there's still 5 more cm's after that? I realized deep in my heart there was no way I could make it. I had been going for 21hrs and getting weaker by the minute, something had to give. I remember thinking to God "That's it, I'm done. I can't make it. I can't birth this baby. I'm sorry God, i just don't have the strength to get her out" My hope had been to go all natural, not for any super woman award, simply because it was my choice and I wanted to meet God in the pain and feel what Mary felt that scary, painful night in Bethlehem. I had done the classes and felt very prepared for what was to come. But nothing could have prepared me for the hours of contractions with little progression. That was a tough moment, trying to decide what to do next, what was best for myself and baby. And honestly, all of a sudden, the reality of having a baby actually hit me...and I started crying. I was so overwhelmed wanting to make the best decision while in agony and still throwing up. I didn't think I would have to make any decisions during labor, I figured it would just happen and progress by itself. But the fact that it wasn't, put me in a tough place. After a few minutes just Scott and I and God, I whispered to Scott "I think I need the E word". Not that I think there is anything wrong with the Epidural, it just wasn't in my plan. But it was in God's plan. Scott was so amazing the whole time through labor, but especially at this time. He quieted my soul and prayed with me and comforted me so sweetly. I love him so much!

So around 6:30pm the Epidural man (kinda like the icecream man without the music) hooked me up and took all my pain away. WOW! Talk about the BEST feeling in my life. One second in agony, the next second on cloud 9 :) Soon after they started Pitocin to gets things hopefully moving faster. John and Rebecca Brown were at the hospital getting a sono done (Bec was 37 weeks) so they stopped by for a visit. It was fun :) My parents, inlaws, Scott and Whit all hung out till around 11pm, then Lauren came and checked me. Finally I was 5cm (4 and a half hours on pitocin and I moved 1cm, I couldn't imagine doing that without the Epidural!) We decided I should try and get some sleep so all of the parents left and Whit, Scott and I tried to get some shut eye. But soon after we turned out the lights, I felt this weird popping sensation and I knew for sure my water broke! So we called the nurse back in and got all that cleaned up (YUK!). I was ecstatic though, FINALLY my body had done something right!!! :D We all went back to sleep till 1am when Lauren checked again and I was 7-8cm, soooo excited to hear this!! I was getting there! Around 2:30am I woke feeling a lot of pressure, I called the nurse back in but she told me Lauren would check in 30mins or so..I said ok, and called Scott over to my bedside to hold my hand as the pressure got more and more uncomfortable. (Whit had gone home at this point to get some real sleep, as the pushing might take a while and we wanted an hour or so by ourselves after delivery).
Around 3am Lauren came in and to everyone's delight I was 10cm's and ready to push! WOW! I couldn't believe it, I was like "I can just start pushing now?" "Yep!" Lauren exclaimed. It was just myself, Lauren, Scott and my nurse Kristen in the room. It was so quiet, peaceful and still, I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. I had waited for this moment for so long! This was day 9 past my due date.
I pushed for about an hour and 20 mins and at 4:28am on Friday the 25th of June, Olivia Marie Custer, weighing 7lbs 12 oz and 21inches long was born! PHEW PTL!...when I pushed her out we realized why everything took so long and I wasn't progressing fast..Olivia had her left arm wrapped around her neck, making her entry into this world more tighter than it already was!...tricky little girl!





Olivia is now 6 and a half weeks old and as cute as ever! This is her and I at a wedding this past Saturday.



She:
is growing faster than I can keep up with
becoming more interactive each day
loves to be swaddled
loves to wear hats
loves her binki
loves to be all snuggled up and warm



loves to stare at walls
loves to scream when going to sleep
loves to sleep with her left arm out of the swaddle



loves to be outside
loves bath time
loves getting her diaper and clothes changed
can sleep for 8 hours straight
doesn't love the nasal aspirator
has big hands and feet
is getting so long!
enjoys talking to us
loves meeting all of mummy and daddy's friends and family!
loves to fly
enjoys pooping out of her diaper and spitting up on mama
loves sleeping in your arms
has long eye lashes
has beautiful blue eyes
loves to fidget
can hold her head up quite well!



loves the Baby bjorn
has a crush on Javen Waechter



and loves mommy and daddy so much!



The last 6 and a half weeks haven't been all roses and smiles though. There have been tears, frustrations, exhaustion, comments like "do you still have the receipt??" (after she cried for 7 hours straight on night three) or " people say it's hard but it's worth it, right now it's just hard, when does the worth it part start?" :P but God has been SO gracious and faithful through it all. He gives us the strength to soothe her when she cries and the patience when she soils her diaper for the 3rd time in one hour (or 5 minutes). He pours out His love onto us so that we can love this helpless beautiful babe moment after moment. When Livvi is fast asleep, I can honestly say that I have never looked upon something more beautiful and more precious. She is so tender, so innocent and so vulnerable and it is my greatest honor to love, watch over and protect this child of God to the best of my ability for as long as we both live. (I sound like I'm making my vows all over again). I love her so deeply. I love her so much more than when I first found out I was pregnant, to carrying her or even that first moment after delivering her.

I'll finish with this pic of Liv and I this morning after I went for my very first run since having her!!! It felt amazing but boy am I out of shape! I haven't ran since I was like 2 months preggo! Almost 10 months ago now!



If you've read this entire post, I take Livvi's hat off to you! Scott calls me a binge blogger...I guess he's right!

Till next time...